Three tomatoes are walkin’ down
the street.
Papa Tomato, Mama Tomato and Baby Tomato.
Baby Tomato starts lagging behind, and Papa Tomato gets really angry. Goes back and squishes him and says:
“Catch up”.
The rest is condiment history.
Once upon a tomato there was a magical spice by the name of uniPEPPERcorn.
All explorers yearned for it, but none could attain.
Then one day Christopher Tomato found it and stole it from the natives.
The rest is condiment history.
Once upon a pepper there was a smoked jalapeno named Chillpotle.
One day, H.I. Larius the tomato came along…
Larius proposed the opportunity for expansion of the mind and palate to all man, plant & animal alike to elevate as one.
The rest is condiment history.
Once upon a tomato there was a jalapeno named Sally.
The boys were all intimidated by Sally because like most jalapenos she Ran a little hot.
Bobby Tomato was not afraid.
The rest is condiment history.
Once upon a tomato there was a pineapple named Porky.
Adopted at an unripe age, he thought he was a tomato. As he grew larger and more prickly on the outside, he remained sweet on the inside; learning to live in harmony with others regardless of their differences.
The rest is condiment history.
Once upon an Asian herb, there was a young root named Tera.
Feeling as if she was missing the right spice in her life, Tera set out to travel the world.
She sailed the sea until she discovered new shores in the land of the free.
The rest is condiment history.
